writing process

Building My Cage

Born free?
Hardly.
Every actions and reaction
Another bar on the cage
Every hurt and every pain
Another bar on the cage
Every time I cry aloud
Another bar on the cage
Every time I shout and rage
Another bar on the cage
Every time I fight for my right
Another bar on the cage
And when I defend myself?
Another bar on the cage
Whether anger or sorrow
Another bar on the cage
When I object and lobby
Another bar on the cage
Every word, every choice
Only cages me further
Now there’s no longer room,
Only enough to lie down
And sob silently
Which was what you wanted

Tap, Tap, Tap

Tap Tap Tap

Send Send Send

Have no more time to spend


With expanding your mind

Or hunting treasures to find

Improving your body

Or strengthening your family


Nothing but Tap Tap Tap

Send Send Send

Only left with your best friend


Eyes fixed downward

Bow to your lord

Bent over like peasants

You lowly subjects


And just Tap Tap Tap

Send Send Send

Only this till the end


Slaves to the device in your hand

I beg your to break away if you can

Rejoin a world of relationships

Love people and forge friendships


No more Tap Tap Tap

Send Send Send

You can heal, you can mend


Be better than a tapping drone

Feeling so connected but really, alone

Stop allowing the drain of your soul

Let go and make living your goal

Ethan Birthday Poem

Happy birthday son

It is so much fun

To celebrate your years

Get together and cheer

For our world is better

Just like warm weather

During the winter weeks

Warm sun on chapped cheeks

You bring so much energy

Adding great memories

For adventures shared

A little more matured

As you turn ten

On your way to be a man

We cherish every day

Our love for you will always stay

What’s in a Name?

I have a confession. I hate naming things in my stories. I hate naming characters, I hate naming places and I hate naming anything else I invent. That’s unfortunate because my favorite genre to write is fantasy so I essentially have to name everything but I hate it. My main character in my Sureshot trilogy is “Durbar.” I hate the name now. It sounds dumb to me at this point. And how did I ever come up with a name I secretly hate? In the first ever roll playing game I played, another guy named the character for me. He said it was a word in old High German or something. It’s stuck now. Then I studied Russian and Serbian and Croatian besides the years of German I studied and my mind was filled with all sorts of sounds that might be forged into a name. Where did the name of the main city in The Sureshot, Harmon, come from? It was the brand name of a set of speakers at the work station I sat at while I began writing my stories. Yeah, not exciting is it?

And since those early names I’ve toyed with all sorts of ways to make names. At one point I built these extensive random roll charts that could help me make random names. A number of the names in The Sureshot are the result of those charts. It worked but it also created dramatic and entirely foreign names that even I had trouble pronouncing.

Besides that I’ve taken to looking up the rosters of baseball teams from a hundred years ago, there are some gems there, or World Cup soccer rosters from decades ago. And when I want the name of a town I often use Google maps to look around the world for an appropriate name to use in a story. But really? I still hate naming things.

But I suppose this is simply a problem with never being happy with the name choices I make. After all, I live in a city called “Fresno.” Allegedly it is the word for Ash tree in Spanish but I’ve never confirmed that. It doesn’t roll off the tongue some some majestic name though does it? so maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on myself.

Oh well, Durbar the Sureshot will live now forever in the pages of the stories I wrote. Still I wonder if he likes his own name. And since that is entirely up to me as his creator, and since I’m a bit dissatisfied with it, then I suppose he wishes he was named something less bland. Sorry, buddy.

In Flight

Flying,

through the dark black sky.

Soaring,

over the tiny world below.

Gliding ,

across huge, crushing, currents.

Sailing,

with the endless wind.

Darting,

past great flashes of lightning.

Skimming,

the thin atmosphere.

Floating,

on the tranquil white clouds.

Living,

everyday, one at a time.

Changing,

with the unpredictable weather.

It will take you where you want to go.

Oldie but goodie: Conan

My friend lent me some of his books as we were chatting about different styles of writing and how I’m exploring them. He’s been reading fantasy since he was a kid. Among his favorites are the Conan stories. I’m loving them. Finished the first book, but it’s honestly a bit of a collection of shorter stories, sort of like Sherlock Holmes. I believe they were written for one of those fantasy/science fiction magazines that used to contain a collection of shorter stories. It means that each story is compact and exciting.

Conan is a fantastic character. Reckless, young, strong and more than a bit self centered he is like an ancient cowboy roaming the world and taking what he wants. It is fun to read them now having watched Conan films staring Arnold Schwarzenegger and even played the recently released video game MMO created around those stories.

As a writer it’s great to read them to get a sense of what worked at the time and get a feel for a different style and purpose. I’m looking forward to reading even more and honing my own skill. Until then, cheers!